Martha gets her kicks

What happens in Vegas...

2008-10-18T02:50:00.003-04:00

Yes, viva Las Vegas. It was more fun than I expected! We stayed at the Stratosphere and went to the very top of the tower with an amazing view of the whole city. We also drove around and I got to see the sights.
I got a little carried away playing Craps, I should've quit while I was ahead...but the free drinks, and the excitement....well, let's just say I don't know when to stop. :)

After Vegas we drove through the mountains of Utah and the moon was so full it lit up the whole road!

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That's all for now, time for a Big Martha nap.

California!! here we came.

2008-10-18T02:26:00.007-04:00

Yes, we are behind a post, but Dan PROMISED to put up the Arizona pictures and for some reason hasn't held up his end of the bargain. What the hell, seriously?

I'm currently in Colorado, so let's do some backtracking. California is where it's at. We drove in through Needles, which is in the desert. As we crossed the state border our car got searched and our oranges were confiscated!! It was like we were crossing into another country or something. Totally ridiculous. The desert was beautiful to drive through, though. I enjoyed the long stretches of land and of course the hot sun!

Our first night we stayed in a Wigwam...no joke.

The next day we got to the end of Route 66, at Santa Monica Pier. California Dreamin at last. I laid out, caught some rays, found a surfer, ya know...the usual...

Dan, Lyndsay, and I were on the prowl for Britney...all we found was her star, lame.

We also went to Disney on a Whim. I wasn't allowed in though, because I was too short to ride the rides. I felt discriminated against, but my friends didn't care and rubbed it in all night.

After LA, we went to San Diego and threw a few back in the Gaslamp and then were on our way to Las Vegas. I'll catch up more in a bit.

peace- Big Martha

Arizona: More Than Just Iced Tea

2008-10-15T13:19:00.006-04:00

After spending the evening in Santa Fe and the night in Albuquerque, we got up this morning, finished out New Mexico and crossed into Arizona. Along the way we found a rusted out car to tell remind us where we're going.

We had a beautiful drive through the desert on some very precarious roads through Oatman, where wild donkeys come down into town each day to greet the tourists and beg for carrots. The weather was nice with lots of sunshine and desert heat. Lets just say, we saw a lot of 'hot Ass' in Oatman.

The rest of the day was fairly uneventful. We drove through long stretches of desert and then crossed into California for the final leg of our Rt66 adventure.

Before we stopped for the night, we came across the famous 'Bottle Ranch'. It was one of the craziest and most beautiful sights we had seen so far. Thousands of bottles topped the towering trees of scrap metal and old highway relics. Most of the structures has something to catch the wind at the top which created a series of haunting creaks, groans and whistles.

Big Martha, Signing off!!

Keep your pants on

2008-10-13T23:42:00.004-04:00

Hey everyone!!!!

Sorry for the extended delay in posts, but its hard to find wireless internet for my MacBook while on the road and in cheap, sleazy motels. I've been writing down my blog on actual paper, like they did when the Bible was written, so as soon as I get a chance I'll post some updates.

I'll still be on the road for the rest of the week as I travel to Las Vegas, Colorado and Nebraska before heading home to West Chester. So expect more crazy stories and silly pictures in the near future.

Right now I gotta go track down some In and Out Burger.

Big Martha, signing off!!

Day 6: New Mexico (now with 10% more!)

2008-10-08T00:28:00.008-04:00

Howdy... that is cowboy for hi.... (clearly)

Big Martha here, and I must say, bigger in Texas, which is where we spent the night last night. The town we were in was SO out there, no food was to be found for 20 miles, at least... (that is NO exaggeration, either) We woke up this morning and I felt horrible... probably from woman issues, which is why i protested all pictures of me today. i look like total crap.

McLean Texas is a real example of a ghost town. There was no one on main street at 10 AM.

There was a refurbished gas station at the end of town that was worth a look, though.

Because there was no food ANYWHERE we drove a ways down the road to The Big Texan. It is the home of the free 72 oz. steak...that is...if you can eat all 72 ounces in one hour. I of course ate it in 15 minutes because I have no digestive system to hinder the process. Go Martha Go.

We pushed on through more deserted towns, on to Amarillo. Just out side of the town there were 10 Cadillacs sticking out of the ground. This is known as the Cadillac Ranch and is an awesome work of art. I added my name to one.

Further down the road we reached the halfway point of Route 66, which is marked by the Midpoint Cafe. A woman named Fran greeted us and we had some pretty great pie. Fran was the inspiration for the character Flo in the Cars movie.

We took the old extension of Route 66 through the mountains to Santa Fe. It was a beautiful drive the entire way there. Once we reached Santa Fe we couldn't believe how an old city could look so perfect. It was really amazing with the unique architecture.

Well hopefully tomorrow I am not so cranky and can get out and really enjoy the trip. For now I'm gonna pop a Midol and call it a day.

This is Big Martha, signing off.

Day 5: Oklahoma is O.K.!

2008-10-07T01:03:00.006-04:00

Today was definitely a trip!
We started out in the morning by paying a visit to the famous Blue Whale. I felt a little like Pinnochio, but I showed that whale who's boss.

Later in the morning we were able to drive quite a long stretch of original Rt66 hand-laid pavement from the 30s. Except for a patch now and then, it was in tip-top shape. In fact, the patches were worse off than the original road. We also came across a piece of evolving art, the Shoe Tree. If I had a pair of shoes with me, I would have gladly added them to the tree. But, since I don't have feet, I didn't bring any shoes.

Along our travels, we've come across many diverse kinds of wildlife. So far we've seen turtles, ducks, llamas, cows, dogs, skunks, a porcupine, and even a roadrunner. But none captured our heart as much as this dead Armadillo.

Other stops along our way included Oklahoma City, a giant oil derek, and the famous U-Drop Inn/Tower Conoco.

We made it to Texas!!! Tomorrow we find out if everything really is bigger here. I have my fingers crossed that it is.

Big Martha signing out!

(I seem to be having some trouble uploading pictures tonight, so i will try to add them tomorrow. keep checking in!)

Day 3 and 4: Missouri Loves Company / We're not in Kansas anymore

2008-10-05T23:33:00.009-04:00

Hey Everyone!!!

Well, apparently there are still places in this country that don't have wireless internet, and last night we were in one of those places. So, today we'll have to play catch-up.

After a good nights sleep, we started day 3 in Springfield, Illinois. While on road we stumbled upon the original Bigfoot. Not the fuzzy creature of myth we all pine for, but the monster truck responsible for the massacre of hundreds of innocent automobiles. I myself even had a small run in with this beast. Fortunately, I escaped just in time.

The other highlight for the day was finding 'John's Modern Cabins' along an old route of the Mother Road. They were extremely creepy and very dangerous. I felt right at home!!!!

That night we stayed in Lebanon, Missouri at an old Rte 66 favorite, the Munger Moss Motel. With its huge neon sign and pessimistic pool (it was half empty), it made for a nice cozy place to rest our heads.

Today we finished out Missouri and then cut through a small corner of Kansas. While visiting Galena we found 'Tow Tater', the inspiration for 'Mater from Pixar's movie "Cars". We also saw many empty Main Streets and run down business fronts. Most places were even more devoid of life because it was Sunday. I even had enough time to lie out in the middle of the road to catch a quick power nap.

After the short drive through Kansas, we made it into the sweeping plains of Oklahoma. We saw Mickey Mantle's 'house', a 90 foot high totem pole, and some really old bridges. We originally stopped at the Elm Motel, but upon seeing a large bug crawl out from under the comforter, we opted for the less wild Claremore Motor Inn. Tomorrow we continue our journey through Oklahoma and more.

Big Martha, signing off!!!!

Day 2: We FOUND it!!

2008-10-03T22:47:00.009-04:00

Today we drove the entire length of Ohio and Indiana and they must be the most boring states ever to drive through! If it weren't for my dear old friend Mary Jane, I wouldn't have made it through with a smile...

After a while we finally reached Bloomington, IL where we drove around for an hour blindly following signs that said historic 66... which literally lead us in circles...

Then, out of pure luck, we ended up on the right road! It was even registering on the GPS, which Route 66 is typically not supposed to. We were disappointed that all of Funk's Grove maple "sirup" was sold out, so we headed to the famous Dixie trucker stop. I was hoping to eat juicy cherry pie, but I had to settle for blueberry, which was quite tasty (and large).

We ran into our first roadside weirdside attractions in Atlanta, IL.

OOOO Britney Spears is on TV, must watch.

Day 1

2008-10-02T23:43:00.008-04:00

We are officially on the road!!!!

Not much to report yet. We saw some nice mountains and foliage this afternoon. We're stopped in Ohio for the night at Zac's Dad's house. We got here in time to have some sloppy joes (I like mine extra sloppy) and watch the VP debate. Joe Biden's teeth hurt my eyes and I just want to hug the life out of Sarah Palin cause she's so adorable. I wish I could bottle her and drink a little bit of cuteness every day. Too bad she's a giant succubus.

Big Martha, signing off

Tomorrow we pick up Rt66 in Bloomington, IL and hit up a crazy maple syrup store.

The Mother Road

2008-09-30T20:51:00.006-04:00

Hey ya'all!
I am now a blogger!!! How exciting is that? I decided to finally break down and sign up for an account. My friends have been pressuring me to do it for a few months now, but I never really had a reason. . .until now. On Thursday I embark on a whirlwind cross-country tour! My best friends Dan and Lyndsay invited me along with them and insisted that I blog our whole trip. At first I was reluctant, but as I thought about it, I became more and more excited. Now I can barely contain myself and want to post every hour. Every 5 minutes even!!! HAHAHAHA! Anyway, I hope there will be many people reading this travelogue, but I expect several of you to not really know who I am. Hopefully someday we will be able to meet face to face at Starbucks or Cosi or somewhere, but until that time here is a little about me. Enjoy!!!

I grew up in a little sleepy town in north-east Pennsylvania by the name of Tunkhannock. It's in the Scranton-Wilkes Barre area. If you have ever seen 'The Office' you know where I mean. (By the way, I love that show. Meredith is a personal hero of mine.) I met Dan 15 years ago when he was a freshman in high school. We didn't have any classes together, but I worked with him for the next four years on the marching band's annual fundraising event: a haunted house. Here's a pic from one of the years we did it.

I was somewhat attached to the guy next to me. Not only did he have me sticking out of his neck, but we were also dating. After the haunted house ended that year, he cheated on me with the troll on the far right. I dumped his ass and told everyone that she gave him chlamydia.

Anywho, when Dan graduated high school he liberated me from my indentured servitude at the haunted house and took me to West Chester University with him. I was accepted into the nursing program, but ultimately was thrown out of the program. I can't get into it here due to legal reasons, but it involved 3 horses, a troupe of authentic french mimes and a half ton of mint jelly.

Needless to say my college experience was like no other. Perhaps some day I'll write a memoir, or even a flashback blog. We'll see. There are a lot of painful memories and drug induced stupors to sort through. Not to mention the hoards of men (and a few women) who I dated. Sometimes I wish I still had their numbers. There was this one guy who really knew how to use a power drill. . . . . .but lets save that for another time. After all, this is a family-friendly blog.

So, after a few years of college traveled the east coast a bit. I made a living with random modeling jobs (usually at Halloween Adventure or an Adult Bookstore), making sandwiches at a Subway sandwich shoppe in a convenience store and competing in an occasional underground bare-knuckle boxing match. Eventually, I settled down into a humdrum monotonous life. I work behind the fine jewelry counter at Bloomingdales in the King of Prussia mall. Because of rising gas prices, I usually take the bus to work. I can't even begin to tell you how many times I've gotten gum in my hair.

Well, that brings me up to today. In just over 36 hours I will be on my way on the great Mother Road. We're going to Ohio to pick up Lyndsay's Marine boyfriend, then picking up Rte 66 and taking it all the way to L.A. with stops in every state along the way and extended stays in Las Vegas and San Diego. Check out my blog every day for an update of our progress and full report on our adventures.

This is Big Martha, signing off. Over and out!!!