I am now a blogger!!! How exciting is that? I decided to finally break down and sign up for an account. My friends have been pressuring me to do it for a few months now, but I never really had a reason. . .until now. On Thursday I embark on a whirlwind cross-country tour! My best friends Dan and Lyndsay invited me along with them and insisted that I blog our whole trip. At first I was reluctant, but as I thought about it, I became more and more excited. Now I can barely contain myself and want to post every hour. Every 5 minutes even!!! HAHAHAHA! Anyway, I hope there will be many people reading this travelogue, but I expect several of you to not really know who I am. Hopefully someday we will be able to meet face to face at Starbucks or Cosi or somewhere, but until that time here is a little about me. Enjoy!!!
I grew up in a little sleepy town in north-east Pennsylvania by the name of Tunkhannock. It's in the Scranton-Wilkes Barre area. If you have ever seen 'The Office' you know where I mean. (By the way, I love that show. Meredith is a personal hero of mine.) I met Dan 15 years ago when he was a freshman in high school. We didn't have any classes together, but I worked with him for the next four years on the marching band's annual fundraising event: a haunted house. Here's a pic from one of the years we did it.
I was somewhat attached to the guy next to me. Not only did he have me sticking out of his neck, but we were also dating. After the haunted house ended that year, he cheated on me with the troll on the far right. I dumped his ass and told everyone that she gave him chlamydia.
Anywho, when Dan graduated high school he liberated me from my indentured servitude at the haunted house and took me to West Chester University with him. I was accepted into the nursing program, but ultimately was thrown out of the program. I can't get into it here due to legal reasons, but it involved 3 horses, a troupe of authentic french mimes and a half ton of mint jelly.
Needless to say my college experience was like no other. Perhaps some day I'll write a memoir, or even a flashback blog. We'll see. There are a lot of painful memories and drug induced stupors to sort through. Not to mention the hoards of men (and a few women) who I dated. Sometimes I wish I still had their numbers. There was this one guy who really knew how to use a power drill. . . . . .but lets save that for another time. After all, this is a family-friendly blog.
So, after a few years of college traveled the east coast a bit. I made a living with random modeling jobs (usually at Halloween Adventure or an Adult Bookstore), making sandwiches at a Subway sandwich shoppe in a convenience store and competing in an occasional underground bare-knuckle boxing match. Eventually, I settled down into a humdrum monotonous life. I work behind the fine jewelry counter at Bloomingdales in the King of Prussia mall. Because of rising gas prices, I usually take the bus to work. I can't even begin to tell you how many times I've gotten gum in my hair.
Well, that brings me up to today. In just over 36 hours I will be on my way on the great Mother Road. We're going to Ohio to pick up Lyndsay's Marine boyfriend, then picking up Rte 66 and taking it all the way to L.A. with stops in every state along the way and extended stays in Las Vegas and San Diego. Check out my blog every day for an update of our progress and full report on our adventures.
This is Big Martha, signing off. Over and out!!!
